No, not the band. My little Lola and not so little Ava have been really sick lately, I think they have a parasite. I randomly took Lola to work yesterday and she started having diarrhea and she threw up on the hubby tuesday night. It was a good thing she went with me because we were able to check a stool sample, bloodwork, and her temperature. All were ok but we did send some off to the lab. I called DH on the way home from work last night and he had just walked in to a mess in Ava's cage. So both my babies were sick and they are both on lots of meds, all given at different times. I have 5 days of forcing medication down my puppies throats, I hope they still love me when it's all over.
We are still on a baby making break as of right now. I'm thinking about going back to school. I have always wanted to go to cosmetology school and I think I'm going to start in the fall. It takes 18 months so I think I'm going to go back on birth control (gasp) until I'm finished. I think the BC will regulate me and make sure nothing happens to interrupt school. I'm at that point where I have to accept I may never be a mom. So I need to have a career and something to do. Something I love. I love my husband and I love kids. I just wished my husband loved kids. He doesn't hate them, he's just never been around them much. He has the attitude of if it happens, it happens. He used to be excited and couldn't wait to have a baby, but I think reality hit him that it was going to be a lot work and a lot of patience. And a lot of dissapointments. I think he just can't deal with the failure that comes along with infertility. I don't want to deal with it either but I want a baby so bad that I would do anything for it. I read a lot of blogs and it seems that 90% of the infertility blogs I read, the women have fallen pregnant. It makes me excited for them and gives me hope, but it also makes me feel a little bit alone.
My best friend and my brother are getting married in a year, this month. Today he is moving about 3 hours away for his job. She will be following in a few months. This is heartbreaking for me. She is the only friend of mine who doesn't have kids, and she is very understanding and involved in my infertility. We've been planning her wedding and it's so exciting. They are planning to start their family the month after they get married, on their honeymoon. I was so excited for her, and couldn't wait to be an aunt again. And now they will be 3 hours away. I know it's not the end of the world but I still wish they were here and I could babysit their baby, and help them out.
Last week my back went out for the 3rd time. I'm still recovering and trying to get back to normal. It's just a huge setback because it was doing so well I was making plans to go to school, and was planning a weight loss program. I'm still going to do those things just in a different way. This spring/summer I'm going to work on my weight. I need to lose about 75 lbs. Thats a lot of weight. But I'm going to do it. I'm going to change my diet, walk a lot, and try to get into a pool as much as I can. The pool will be best because I'm weightless and I can do the most excercise. I know this is a really long post but it's been almost 3 months and I have A LOT to say.
