Maybe One Day

So I sat down and thought for a while and since I have new insurance and all I've decided, without DH's help, that I am just going to go see my OB and ask to be put on BCP. DH and I haven't really had a deep discussion and I didn't feel like I needed one since I vented on here last week, but I feel the best solution is to start from scratch and get myself ovulating with the help of BCP. After 6 months or so I will see how I feel, and see what the Dr. has to say at my appt. and then I'll for sure know what to do. I've had 2 serious boyfriends in the past and it kills me to say that BOTH of them are going to be fathers now. They both have girlfriends they knocked up, which adds salt in my wounds about feeling like I'm "broken". Its like there were soooo many chances with either one of them for me to accidently get pregnant and it just never, ever happened. 2 years with one and 31/2 with the other and nope nothing. And to top it all off their girlfriends, not wives, are giving those two irresponsible idiots what I've always dreamed of. I did the right things that whole time, abided by the law, prayed at night, used my manners, respected my elders, didn't do drugs, or never became an alcholic and I have a hard time understanding why after all they've done wrong, they get what I want most. I know I know someday my time will come, at least I sure hope so, but as I learned as a child- sometimes life isn't fair. You'd think maybe karma would bite these two in the a** at some point because Lord if they didn't give me a hard time when I dated them. So come on karma, show me you exist!