A different not me monday

I haven't really been blogging too much because I haven't been feeling like myself. So it's techinally a "not me" monday and I don't really feel like doing an actual one. Anyway I tested last Friday just to make sure I didn't happen to ovulate the weekend before because I wasn't doing any ovulation tests then. It was a BFN. Even though I was sure it would be, any BFN is still depressing. I feel like the 2ww makes me really cranky and really unable to deal with any bullshit. Which is why DH and I are in a huge fight right now. I really wish I was able to get on here and blog about how great my life is, how loving, supportive, and caring my DH is, but that's just not how my life works. It's not perfect, we're not perfect. We fight a lot somethimes, and sometimes things are great. We try for a baby for awhile, then we take a break and then we try again. It's a crazy cycle in which we live. We both want to be parents and we love each other but we just have a few things to work through. I read a lot of blogs and I never read any where they talk about the stress infertility has on there marriage. I mean they say it but I've never read that they are fighting with their husband, that they have huge blow up fights from the infertility drugs. So I'm here to say that things aren't going well at this point. But they'll get better, soon I hope. I test this Friday and I'm pretty sure it will be BFN, as the only symptoms I have are sore boobs (which always happens after I take fertility drugs) and being a little lethargic. I blame the sleepiness on the weather and most of all the cramping and spotting I had has stopped. So we'll see what happens!